Abstract Structure

Updated: May 21

I can’t say exactly how many times I have written about "the slap-down." More than a dozen times including comments on social. The story consumes us. From my lens as an integral coach, I see Will's lack of life integration, front and foremost — he is compartmentalized: his career and marriage, at odds. I hope these parts of life get better for him in the future.

Let's face it. The Oscar incident demonstrates that Will, like many of us, has never been "all together."

I am not condoning what Will did when he had his very public, human, broken moment. Under pressure, Will Smith unraveled.

Our society purports that money and accomplishments mitigate human failings. Band-Aids them, maybe. But heals them, almost never. The work to heal your trauma is your work.

So where do we go from here? We focus on our collective selves and why this incident has garnered so much attention in a post-pandemic, divided, war-torn world. Perhaps, we are drawn to the story because we understand what it is like to be under pressure. More importantly, we know what it feels like when pressure no longer holds us together.


Updated: Jun 11

Recently, two people asked me, “What I wanted?" One person is a new colleague who helps organizations build great conversations. So, I believe this type of inquiry is his practice. The other is a peer running a successful coaching business who is helping me with opportunities in my own development. What a privilege 1) to be asked what I wanted, 2) to know what I wanted, and 3) to say what I wanted. Nature vs Nurture From my perspective as an integral coach, I understand that lifetime patterns can occur. And, I also understand that those patterns can occur in the context of how each of us processes our experiences. The nature vs nature debate applies to almost every characteristic, behavioral pattern, and choice we make.

So yes, what a privilege 1) to be asked what I wanted, 2) to know what I wanted, and 3) to say what I wanted. It was a privilege to step away from my familiar pattern and to chose desire over duty. Raise your hand if you've stepped away from a familiar pattern and you can relate.

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Updated: Feb 19

If you have one of these small animals living with you, such as a dog, cat, etc. You know that they have their signals, they read yours, and many can build up a vocabulary of spoken human words. Just like we come to know a particular bark or yawn to have meaning.

Training this pup is a form of meditation in what feels like a topsy-turvy world. The effort everyone in our family is putting into finding a way to peacefully coexist with our new little buddy, reminds us all that even when the shared vocabulary is limited there is a way to come to an understanding.

It's not a perfect world and we evolve our approach when things don't seem to connect. We are in constant conversation with our trainer. But, we recognize failure as an event, not "something Louis (like Armstrong) did wrong." We just keep our focus on rewarding what we want to continue, ignoring what is irrelevant, and talking through what we want to change.

For our family, the value of integrating a pet has been in the need to constantly evolve our approach. Life is dynamic and as we learn more, we ground and grow at the same time.